Realized its been over 2 weeks since i last updated this blog, due to a variety of reasons but when i write in my journal daily and correspond via email to those that write, i wonder why i do not put more energy into this site. The most honest answer would have to be FEAR. Fear of being misunderstood, of offending those I mention on this blog and those i do not, fear of such an expanded general audience-how truthful and honest should i be about my experinces? most being very personal, guess i just have a general fear of being known completely. Came to the recent realization that my whole life, I have told alot to everyone but not all to anyone. And again a fear of what others will do with information they have about me. Guess I have become comfortable with being ellusive or as my Switzerland friends call me-Casper(yes, like the ghost). Another fitting title as i've been told that peolpe like having me around but I just dont seem to bew so on a consistant basis. So in case, you havn't noticed-doing a lot of self-reflection on this trip. And I have realized how selfish it is of me to not share with you about my trip, i dont have to tell all but at least keep you up-to-date. For afyter all, it is you-my friends and family, those I have met on my journey and those I've yet to meet- that have made this trip possible and worthwhile. For i have always said that despite my wonderful education :), 90% of insights gained have been from the life experiences i have had and people i have met. I am so greatful for my life and the amazing peolpe i have in my life and the ones i am meeting along the way.
Spent Sunday March 30th,in Chandigarh, Punjab-beautiful & wonderful, not at all the crazy hectic India i have experienced(yet still loved) thus far. the day was spent relaxing in the Rose Garden, walking around the very creatively designed Rock Garden and enjoying cycle rickshaw drives through the quiet-no loud traffic, pollution, cattle, etc- tree lined streets as the sun shone on my face. Felt like Anne of Avonlea or a princess being escorted around town. Then late night(starting at 12:30am) was an extremely bumpy 8 hour bus ride up the mountain where the uneven terrain actually lifted me a few feet off my seat-odd though i actually enjoyed it or enjoyed myself in spite of it, either way was worth it as early Monday morning i arrived in Mcloud Gonj in the Himilayas. The views here are breathtaking-my room(although rather noisy and thin walled) faces the mountain. Slept till 12:30 so got a late start but Sunday and up till now have been my best days in India thus far. I cannot even begin to explain the amount of spirituality and healing that is in this place; on the other hand, dont know that i have been in one single place and experienced the level of negative dark energy that is also present here. Its such an odd dichotomy that has nade it difficult to breathe at times and created so much anxiety. Spoke to many individuals-from a female traveler who was drugged here in a local restaraunt in broad daylight in January, to my yoga & reiki teacher, to the countless reports of kidnappings, murders and dissapearnaces that occur here regularly( mostly drug related).Also, as this is the home of the exiled dala lama, it is reported in today's newspaper that an increase in security has been assigned due to an evergrowing # of threats have come against him recently. Odd cause every city I have been in, starting with Malaysia has had a bombing, masss shooting or both on the day i was in that city but yet i still feel very safe and protected but nonetheless, please keep me in your thoughts and prayers. My eyes have opened up to so much and i am so blessed to be on this journey!
It is Tuesday night now and I am sad that I spent such little time here-it is always in retrospect- but would really like to come back next May and spend a few months here doing yoga, trekking, attending lectures and volunteering. Had such a wonderful experience here today. After my Reiki class I walked 3km uphill to the Zilnon Kagyeling Nyingma Monastery to attend a lecture by the book author and the Dalai Lama. By the time i got there was 30 minutes late and struggled with being in a small cramped dark room while the sun was shining so brightly and surrrounded by such amazing scenery. decided to opt out on the class and just sit on a bench and read. Was there for less than 3 minutes when my instincts(which have incredibly strengthened on this trip) told me to head downstairs to the larger rooftop. Sat on a makeshift bench of unsanded plywood and no back, just a metal frame. Sat on this bench reading my much anticipated book when a friendly monk appeared and started chatting with me in extremely limited English. After a few minutes I returned to my book and he left. Ten minutes later, this monk, Gyatso, sat down next to me with a writing pad and an English/Tibetan/Sanskrit phrasebook. He asked me to pronounce the first sentence- I did so slowly, word-for- word, "Can you please tell me how to get to the nearest hotel?" I have to say his pronunciation was not bad. He then asked me to say the next line. This went on for 2 1/2 hours!! During this time we were joined by a small older Tibetan woman with very long silvery hair that she combed the whole time while repeating some of the English words, "pillowcase", "bedsheet" and asked me to teach her all the English words for her body parts, then there was the monk who just sat and laughed with us and every once in a while tried his hand at pronouncing a random English word, then a monk who spoke English more fluently than the others came to me with a specific list of words he had written out. While I sat in the sun breaking down English words syllably by syllable and patiently waiting for them to pronounce the words correctly, not at all upset that I was able to read my book I had intended on, I was becoming increasingly greatful that I was able to help these people who had a genuine interest and are actually incredibly quick learners. It was amazing to me Gyatsos ability to recall a whole sentence in a foreign language that he had just learned a few minutes prior, And as he struggled with a few words, like the 4 syllabled "expensive" and then finally mastered it, his triumph bcame my own. It was an incredibly rewarding afternoon and i realize that God had completely answered my daily prayer to the universe to allow me to make a difference and use my gifts to benefit others. Just upset i have to leave tommorow but really looking forward to Greece and my backpacking budddy meeting me there :)
Love & miss ya all